This is The Cow.
The Cow (also known to some as "Big Red") is a 16 year old whose hobbies consist of eating and . . . eating more.
Observers of The Cow may find it hard to believe that she is able to choose a favorite food, but it is, in fact, chocolate ice cream. The Cow could (and would) eat chocolate ice cream without end until the completion of her life if she had an endless supply--but instead must be patient between grocery shopping trips and find other sugary foods to consume.
Today The Mothership and I (Chubby Tuffin) confronted The Cow about eating 4 packages of rice pudding for lunch. She saw no problem with it, and then suggested that she could triple task by mowing the field, studying for "horse bowl," and eating more rice pudding all at the same time (The Cow is also an irresponsible driver--which we will address in further detail in another post).
The Cow tried to argue the benefits of buying herself rice pudding by telling The Mothership that she should be grateful because The Cow had her debit card and "could have bought a five-star meal instead."
The Cow's interesting quotes of the day?
The Cow: "I'm very active: I thought about running once..."
The Mothership: "To the fridge?"
Also:
The Cow: "Unless you monitor the kitchen 24/7, you won't be able to keep track of what I eat."
